wat bout pragnant strippers??
Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
Our kitchen sink faucet is leaking, so I set a pitcher under it to catch water for Kool-Aid tomorrow rather than turn on the faucet. The environment owes me.
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I cooked you Mac and cheese when I was drunk and drugged. That counts for about 4 meals. Try harder
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
Randomize