At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
Text me right after you finish, I want to know how the ghetto fleshlight worked out
How about I just call you while I'm doing it so you can hear my reaction?
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
When I woke up I had 6 missed calls making sure I was ok and asking if I remember showing my tits to a picture of her baby.
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
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