I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thank you for making it possible for me to get laid while having peace of mind my dog is well taken care of.
I have 3 texts in my phone that say "Thanks King Tyler". I think I've successfully drank myself into a monarchy.
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
Yup, two strangers look up at each other and realize the only connection they have is the dead woman they banged to death below them. Magic. They have to be best friends now.
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
Success! We fucked roommates!
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