tell me how a rose bowl party involves waking up to find a raccoon in my kitchen cabinet eating my oreos the next morning?
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
Hey please buy toilet paper today. Plastic grocery bags are starting to hurt now
He motorboated me, gave me a business card that said congratulations on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
I'm sorry I didn't get you anything for your birthday
It's just you didn't get me the fucking bear suit last year
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
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