I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
so... my grandma just told me i should be a stripper
well at least shes not calling you fat anymore
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
It really went downhill when you started writing IOU on pieces of napkins. Giving them to the strippers
Real life dumb and dumber
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
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