is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
We can smell you smoking weed from downstairs and your little brother is asking why the upstairs smells like gasoline. Please smoke in the basement. XOXO dad.
Well we were just driving down the street, there was a realtor and a couple walking up the porch of a house for sale, mark sticks his head out, opens his mouth to say something, pukes all down the side of the car, pauses, and yells "THIS IS A PHENOMAL NEIGHBORHOOD YOURE GONNA LOVE IT"
it's great music for shaving your balls
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
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