Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
The little girl I babysit saw pink plastic shot glasses in my car and asked what they were for and I told her they were princess teacups.
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
The cop left me alone after I gave her my spare snow cone. It was a hot and humid day and that uniform looked stuffy. Yay stoner me for overindulging in icy treats.
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
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