Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
I wish you were here to vomit in your hand.
My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
the room spins SO much faster in panama
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
So I come back home and a huge flock of enormous vultures are on my roof
They're waiting for you to die
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
I'm sorry, I'm tired, I can't play long distance cockblock anymore. Good night don't get too pregnant.
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