my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
just dd'd my mom home while she begged me to let her drunk dial my ex, jammed out to party in the usa, and then passed the fuck out. thanks for the genes mom.
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
You know how I said I'd never worry about my roommate? Well I just walked in on her masturbating to Star Trek.
Did she boldly cum where no one has cum before?
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
Imma do four shots of whisky within two minutes and pass out. Otherwise this'll go badly.
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
You ruined the universe
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
Randomize
