No, you can still breathe under the balls.
i'm at a party where swedish girls are dumping laundry detergent on each other because it glows in blacklight. this is awesome
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
You know you've got awesome issues when the main deciding factor of whether or not to cut your nails depends on nacho consumption in the near future
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
FYI you are now my emergency contact at plan parenthood
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
Randomize
