It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
Good thing I took the morning after pill cuz I pretty much had packaged seamen in me like I was a squirrel saving it for later or something
I can hear my parents having sex. I REPEAT. I CAN HEAR MY PARENTS HAVING SEX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
Your mom is 55 and has MS. To be honest, I'm proud of her, and you should be too, bitch.
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
IT IS CHRISTMAS EVE AND I AM SUPPOSED TO BE HAVING SEX WITH AN ATTRACTIVE BLACK MAN IN THE NEXT FEW DAYS AND I JUST GOT MY PERIOD. WHEN PEOPLE ASK ME WHY I DON'T BELIEVE IN GOD I WILL TELL THEM OF THIS DAY.
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
woke up next to the new dishwasher. set the record for banging a new employee to 6 hours...i should be a professional sexual predator
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
Randomize
