mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
Getting "I couldn't find the front door so I climbed in through window" drunk seems to be a habit of yours
Well I accidentally flashed a 76 year old woman, i'm in a house full of republicans and Im almost drunk enough to give the gay rights speech so i'd say this wedding reception is going great
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
I'm so high I have morphed into the monopoly man. Or maybe the Pringles guy. I don't know but I have a mustach now
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
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