): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
So some girl kept staring at me and giving me these weird looks. That's when I realized she could probably hear the Mulan soundtrack playing on my iPod...
i'm so high that for the last 10 minutes i pretened my sock was a mouse, and played with it like it was legit.
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
We are going to the humane society and getting you microchipped so you don't get lost on your birthday. Either that or your getting a child leash
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
Randomize
