Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
Good to know: if a hot girls asks to go back to my place, she probably just needs to vomit all over my bathroom
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
You know it's really hard to draft fantasy football players in a crowded bar when I have a raging hard on
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
Randomize
