so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
My mother walked into the bathroom at 345 am while I was splashing in the bathtub with the remnants of her birthday cake all over me... she looked at me and walked out...
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
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