I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
Life Goals: never under any circumstances, pee in an elevator again. No matter how drunk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
Whoever put the life size cut out of Snoop Dog next to me in bed understands me.
Look I'm really hungover so let's try this again. In 5 mins you're gonna call me and tell me that you're on your way with xannies, iced coffee and a back rub
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
Randomize