we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
Why is your name written on my hand surrounded by hearts and a bartenders phone number?
#1- I went to button my shirt only to find they were all mising. #2- I'm so fu@king sore I feel like I was sweating to the oldies all night. #3- this pounding headache I have, I blame solely on Jennifer. Everyone sounds like Billy Mays when they talk. I remember nothing from last night, I'm concerned.
Why is there a water bottle full of red wine on my desk this morning?
See you tonight.
You called me to pick you up from the bar at 9:00. When we drove over the speed bumps you put your hands in the air and pretended you were on a roller coaster.
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
The guy in the room next to me just offered to hide the next dose of morphine he will get for his broken leg under his tongue and then swap it with me in exchange for a roll of the good toilet paper my parent brought for me last they visited. The psych ward is a lot more hardcore than I thought.
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