idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
i found a twelve pack under my bed. and a six pack in my closet. I'm like a fucking alcoholic squirrel.
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
I like my landing strip. Makes me feel sophisticated.
What you did last night can never be called sophisticated. I don't care how you trim your pubes.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
I cannot be with a girl who won't let me come home on my lunch break, eat spicy ranch and watch Breaking Bad without pants on. #lesbianproblems
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
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