Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
im sorry i hit your dog last night,,,i didnt even see it
I dont have a dog?
WTF
I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
There's a litter of kittens in my bathtub and beer cans everywhere. I want my apartment key back.
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
Call me and get me out of this conversation NOW. My coworker is talking to me about her birds having sex again...
Hired a new intern today and we have something in common. I blew her boyfriend in high school. Do you think she knows?
Randomize