Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
he is so obsessed with the fact that he works at Apple
i know, its like he jerks off to steve jobs
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
I just ate a fried snickers. I now officially accept all fat jokes
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
I can't figure out if I'm dying from all of the booze still in my system, or from the cement wall.
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
Personally, if my roommate had a nice friend who made me dinner, gave me free beer, a 4am meal, a couch to sleep on in an apartment on the beach, and breakfast when I woke up, and I found out that said roommate was fucking her, I'd be all... right on! She's cool! Thanks for the quesadillas!
I was drunk and on Craigslist.. The drunk-text offers people got must have been either horrifying or glorious
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
Randomize
