Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
I told my boyfriend my favorite food was strawberry poptarts, now my email inbox is getting spammed with nude pics of him with his dick in a poptart box..
Just found out that I was singing john legend songs as I threw up last night. Quality.
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
So mom called me from the hospital laughing her ass off. Apparently my sister is allergic to cocaine...
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
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