go do what you do best...puke behind churches
So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
you didnt know i had herpes?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she danced around my room naked waving around the gold trojan magnum condoms singing "i have the golden ticket."
little did she know i was taping her the whole time.
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
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