bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
I just saw a pregnant woman with a cigarette and a beer walking into the Larry the Cable Guy show. I'm glad my taxes are paying her medical expenses.
well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv'
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
She was so morning drunk she asked the lady at brueggers for a bandaid and my self respect back
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
I made a White Russian but saw how early it was and decided to substitute it for milk in my lucky charms. This is what it means to be an adult.
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
I just discovered my new vice. Cotton candy vodka. Its like a carnival in my mouth, puking of the tilt-a-whirl included.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
Randomize
