Do vagina's smell?
i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
this morning your mother said to me "sorry to have to meet you like this, in my sons bed" later she said "you never know whos gonna be in there. its scary sometimes"
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
Legit just heard the bartender tell some Dude "Penis is not an accepted currency in this establishment" and Dude responded "You take Vagina then?"
Randomize
