Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
So my Christmas cards this year will be my mug shot with my kids face photo shopped next to me....too ghetto?
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
I'm mumbling to people and trying not to accidentally shit my pants
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
The waitress at the airport bar just asked me if I wanted a "to go" beer, hahahahaha OF COURSE I WANT A TO GO BEER.
You've slept with someone mentioned in the NY Times, that officially makes you the most famous person I know.
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
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