doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
Because nothing screams stable like yelling at a guy in a bar because last time you hooked up he stole your underwear.
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
I feel like a weird modern Betty Crocker. I'm icing a cake and looking at gay porn, if that's not an accurate portrayal of the 21st century idk what is.
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
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