if you like me you must not know who I am
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
I said we should get a taxi and you were waving down cars, three of which were cops and one of them slowed down and shook his head then kept driving
He didn't think we needed a taxi
She keeps telling me I can't keep feeding the dog my food. I gave half the weed brownie to the dog and half to me. I just want it to taste the greatness of cheezits like I am.
My bathing suit kept falling whenever I went under a wave and this kid caught on and kept checking them out so I told him nothing comes free $5 a boob
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
Randomize
