so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
How is it that I know 4 different bartenders who won't charge me for drinks, but I can't get laid?
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
Randomize
