Haha na a cat just ran under your car. Howd that happen?
Probably a woman cat. Doesnt think things through
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
I knew things were bad when I walked in on you feeding juice to your iPhone
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
I feel kind of like we’re in a gang and tonight is one of those “people are gonna know not to fuck with us” type of nights. And then tomorrow I am going to learn to pole dance. I’m not really sure how I got to this point in my life… but I like it.
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
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