No, drunk sperm still make babies.
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
Woke up to a bouquet of flowers in my toilet bowl. Drunk hubby loves me.
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
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