She went from zero to smokin in five shots
I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
One of your snapchats was of you with a 40oz of Mickeys and the caption: "Deep Throat back in her natural habitat"
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
Nothing says "i love you" more than flowers and potatoes
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
Randomize
