It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
Randomize
