Vanilla vodka + chocolate soymilk does NOT equal an epic milkshake.
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He thought the strainer was a giant bowl to puke in.
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
You spent the entire night trying to catch pigeons and hugged a homeless guy and then gave him a pregnancy test.
So what we learned was that it doesn't matter how skinny the stripper is, if she sits on your knee with a torn acl for two hours it's going to swell up
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