She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
i just yelled "run, its godzirra!" to an asian kid who looked confused by the tornado alarm test
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
Listen, if I miss the flight to Vegas because she's still rimming my ass, it will have been worth it.
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
Randomize
