Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
She calls her new ritual "bed, bath, and beyond crunk". Hence why I found her passed out in my bath tub this morning.
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
The last person that asked me out got pushed down an escalator
So I just watched a seagul attack my boss and steal his food in the parking lot. Today might not be a bad day lmfao.
Randomize
