my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
He told me his condom was going to expire tomorrow and he needed to use it. I can't believe I fell for it.
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
That girl from the bar sent me a text saying that she wants to wear my cock as a hat. A cock hat. Is that good or bad?
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
WHAT THE FUCK I JUST PULLED TWO TAMPONS OUT OF MY VAGINA. WHERE DID THE OTHER ONE COME FROM??
....surprise!
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