I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
What do you think that old couple was thinking when they saw me puking in the QT parking lot at ten in the morning?
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
Can't wait to go see my drug dealers baby being born. He rolled all of the "it's a boy" cigars into blunts.
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
I am one with the molecules
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
I'm waiting for your stupid pizza and this 400 lb drunk man is behind me singing the acapella version of Elevation by U2
Randomize
