My secretary told me she wishes she can have an affair with someone in the office (she's separated from her cheating husband)...Umm...Okaaay
he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
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He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some old bald man is a 100,000 dollar Audi sports car just revved his engine at me and held out his phone at me trying to get my number. I hate the valley.
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
Stop chatting and get in the fucking car. I didn't get my asexual ass out of bed just to watch you flirt and fail with someone you're never going to see again.
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
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