I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
No one likes a giant penis on their phone screen. I mean cmon. I'm a lady.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
I just folded my boss's lingerie. I need a drink and a raise
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
Randomize
