this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
I just don't have the heart to tell my mom you peed in our washer machine last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
Would you please stop exposing your tits on my couch?
Fuck you, my tits are fabulous
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
Randomize