Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
bikini waxes are so much more painful when you know you're not getting laid
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why were you staring at her like that over breakfast?
Because I was eating with a spoon to remind her that she threw up on my hand while she was MAKING me spoon with her after our drunk sex. She got it. Don't worry.
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
No...this little piggys going to the bar
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
I changed his name in my phone to "Irrelevant" last night. Not changing it back.
You're going to find someone that you love very much and that loves you, and then you're gonna find an additional person that you literally can't stop staring at from across the room. I feel very confidently about that
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
Listen, yo... we need to have a serious conversation about this Dollar Store toilet paper. Because if I’m going to finger someone’s ass, it’s not going to be my own.
Randomize