Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
the cashier wished me a happy fathers day while i bought condoms
I can feel you judging me through the phone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someone sent me a drink from across the bar. It was water.
I want you to tape your fingers together and give me a lobster claw hand job.
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
Your birthday is now over. Your day in the spotlight has dimmed and now you're as special as everyone else. The world goes back to revolving around me. Good night.
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
Randomize