carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
Sooo, my mother is snoring, my ex is sexting me, the guy I'm having an affair with is sending me dick pics, and all I want to do is sleep!
I’m also apparently a very socialist drunk now
Instead of a horny one. All I want to fuck is capitalism these days.
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