She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
New brilliant plan: invite two random okcupid girls to the same bar at the same time, have them compete
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
Based on the fact my iPad is covered in pizza, I'm going to assume I ate pizza last night
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
My life is literally "I'm too horny you can't leave" or "let's have pie" there's like no inbetween
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
Ik youre sleeping but fyi its 5:32am I'm sitting in the middle of the road bra less and shoeless with boxers in my hand and no ride. Shits real crazy.
Randomize