Got separated, got a half bj, got dropped off in random part of the city, don't tell anyone
guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
I just sent Brandon a snapchat where I wasn't wearing a shirt but had a rooster drawn on my boobs that said "cock block" and laughed for 10 minutes I have problems don't judge me
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
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