Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
I'm pretty sure he told me he was sterile and I told him I was on the pill. The positive pregnancy test I'm holding in my hand right now tells me that at least one of us was lying.
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
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