so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
Ever have the mailman look at you like youre a chronic masterbator. I have.
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
You know in a few years she's gonna look like her mom. So if you're gonna hit that you better do it while she still looks like somebody else.
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
Randomize
