the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
New definition for "rock bottom": Waking up in a puddle of your own puke, missing your fake tooth. Then having to dig through said puddle of puke for aforementioned fake tooth. Think it's time I quit partying so hard.
Is this your way of breaking up with me as my wingman?
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Being engaged is strange. I looked at my cock this morning and said, "we did alright these last 32 years, right?"
When are your genitals available?
I need a drink. No, several. I need several drinks. Drunk, I need to be drunk. Definitely need to be drunk
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
Randomize