Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
Then you got drunk and shit in her car. Nothing before that matters. She isn’t calling you back.
Randomize