I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
"She's seriously grinding on him while whispering into his ear, 'take me to McDonald's.'"
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
The worst thing about buying this extremely comfortable bed is that once I get a girl into it, all she wants to do is sleep. I want my fucking money back.
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
Randomize
