It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
I caught him trying to shit in her bed. I asked him why he was doing it and he said "because it's wrong."
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
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