end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
I feel like strippers are like dogs, the more you show you're terrified the faster they come at you.
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
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