he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
I said I wanted my dignity back. He brought my thong to me after sharpie-ing "dignity" on the front. I'm not sure if I should me mad or impressed.
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
apparently it isn't appropriate to tell a coworker who is eating celery because it's "negative calories" that a blowjob is too
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
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